Purposeless Fathers? Oh no!

Have you seen purposeless fathers moving around? If you're reading this, chances are you're not one of them. The reason why I asked what makes you cry is for you to get in touch with your life purpose.

Now, stay with me. If I sound weird, this is because you don't hear people discuss this in schools, much less in the companies where you work 10, 20, 30, 40 years! No, they don't.

[caption id="" align="aligncenter" width="446" caption="Man in deep thought. Photo taken from http://www.pixelfight.com/all-photos/deep-in-thought/"][/caption]

If truth be told, they don't even normally discuss this in the Church! They tell you to get in touch with God. They tell you to know Jesus. They tell you to pray for the enlightenment of the Holy Spirit. They're all setting you up to the right path.

But what is it that makes you move?

What's your purpose? What's your uniqueness? That's in the first chapter of the first book of the Bible, the Genesis. We're all born men and women, and we're all born unique. We're also born in the image and likeness of our Creator.

If the Creator has a purpose, so do we. What's yours? Get your clue from the things that make you cry.

I see a phenomenon called purposeless fathers. It's happening very rampantly, and this is an emotional issue for me. I see fathers, who are close to my heart, who are wandering around purposeless.

When I was in college, I counted at least eight friends who married their college girlfriends during or within three years after graduation. Of these eight, only three were still together that last time I heard about them.

This wounded me, coz their wives were also my friends. I was wounded all the more by the seeming pettiness of the reason for the separation of at least one of these pairs.

I only have one question: shall their kids grow without fathers? I can't bear the thought of it. I feel for their children.

I have other examples, even closer to home that I don't have the heart to write about. But the pain is searing.

You may have other examples in your own life too. What are they? Do you see fathers who can't seem to make up their minds about their life, and allow themselves to get entangled in petty issues that everybody faces anyway?

What are we doing about it?


At my end, I have three options to help them: (1) pray for them, (2) maintain this blog and (3) coaching those who are willing. Men by nature do not want instructions. Men by nature do not want unsolicited advise. Men by nature want to do things "my way" (now you know that song is very popular among karaoke-going men, don't you?).

So, preaching to men won't work. Naggers, you have been warned.

Nor will treating them like derelicts work. I know at least two who have totally lost their self-confidence. When I met their wives, I think I knew why.

How are you helping those fathers around you who are struggling? Are you part of the problem? or the solution?

What works? Remind men of their purpose. Once they've found it, be that man's Number 1 cheerer. It doesn't matter whether you are the father yourself, or a friend of one, or the husband of one.

Cheer the father, even if you have to cheer yourself sometimes.

Be purposeful. Someone is watching and following you: your kids, especially your sons who model you. Where do you want these kids to end up one day?

May your son model on you rightly.

Daddily yours,

Marvin

RaisingFilipinoBoys.com

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